its raining. bolts of lightning and claps of thunder are raging about in the sky. such simple things. just electrons...unstable ones. sometimes i wonder what it would feel like. being so displaced that you just explode into bursts of electric energy. I guess that would be really...painful. Whenever it rains, i feel kinda gloomy. i remember the time when our lil family would huddle together inside the master's bedroom during a thunderstorm. Mom would go and make some arroz caldo or better yet, some champorado and we'd eat it while remaining wrapped in bedsheets and blankets. Ate mai would always cry when a loud thunderclap hurt her ears. I wasn't as scared though. I was more afraid that the electricity would be cut. I never slept during a thunderstorm. Iv always had this fear of waking up alone. waking up and seeing no one, waking up and seeing only shadows. I always hated waking up alone. I was a fraidycat. Now im not as scared. my concerns have changed. now i worry about how to get home from this place when it rains. i miss being a kid....being able to just go and hug dad whenever im scared...being comforted by my mom whenever im sad or hurt...i miss waking up feeling happy and secure...

but i think i'll get by...i always have...
and im thankful for it...

well this is new...
a happy thought...